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BookEnds Literary Agency New Client Alert- Stacy Barnett Mozer

Introducing Your Characters in Their Best Light

The way you introduce your characters in the query says everything about the way they are presented in your book. Agents know this and it is part of their decision to pass or request.

When revising the query look at how you introduce your female characters and ask yourself if you are introducing the male characters in the same way.

If you’re focusing on looks are you doing it for both? Or are you breaking your women down to simply looks and giving your men more substance?

For example, I get a lot of queries that say something like, “Jack Sprat was strong and ambitious. One of the smartest men in the company, he was someone everyone wanted to be around. He also ate no fat. His Wife was beautiful and well-dressed. She ate no lean.”

When I see a query that introduces a woman only by her looks I am lead to believe that you have not created well-rounded and believable women. You are not writing a book I want to read.

Your Characters in Real-Life

Imagine you’re at a cocktail party and introducing your characters to a friend. Would you say, “Have you met Jack Sprat, he’s an incredible man with tons of credentials? He eats no fat. And this is His Wife. Isn’t she cute? She eats no lean.”

Queries tell us a lot about the characters and the authors. The little things matter.

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One comment

  1. I love the cocktail party example. I often tell my Barbarians never to say anything on social media they wouldn’t say in real life, but had never thought to apply the same logic as you have. Clever!

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